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The Betty Blog
Single Again on Valentine's Day
Single Again on Valentine's Day
February 14, 2008
Truth is, I've been so busy working on fabulous events that writing blog entries has taken a back seat. But, what wonderful things we have coming up. Check our the new At-A-Glance listing of what all we have to look forward to:
Betty's List Quick*E / At-A-Glace
Now comes time to republish below my favorite statement, originally written in 2006, about what Valentine's Day means to me. Quoth the Raven: "Nevermore!" Salute!
February 14, 2006
It’s Okay-To-Be-Ha . . .
Single Again, on Valentines Day!
A professor I once knew said he was one of the original members of the popular 60s rock band called Paul Revere & The Raiders.
He also got my attention by telling a story about what often happens
when you mispronounce the name of the place where you are.
The college town where I met him was located in Oktibbeha (ok-TIB-uh-hah) County,
Mississippi. There are more than a few place names in my home state
derived from words in the language of the Choctaw Native American
Indians.
It seems this new-in-town professor had created much
merriment among the locals by saying the county name as Okay-To-Be-Ha,
and thinking the chief of the tribe must have been trying to tell a
visitor that it is Okay-To-Be-Here.
I’ve not been able to verify
his claim to rock band fame, but his story has stayed with me and comes
again this Valentines Day . . . when I find myself . . . still
single? . . . in the Castro? . . . on Valentines Day?
You
bet! Not everyone in my neighborhood is rushing around passionately
trying to exercise their rights to same-sex marriage. There are some of
us, in fact, who just won’t settle until Ms. or Mr. Right comes along,
if he or she ever does . . .
. . . and some who
actually wish that the future of our Civil Rights didn’t rest on how
this issue falls off the fence . . . although many won't admit it
in public, so strong is the peer pressure (1) to want to be in a
couple, and (2) to want to participate in an outdated non-secular
institution (my words) and have it sanctioned by the state . . .
I've
heard all the arguments about equal access, but I'll never truly
understand why my commitment and belief in long-term monogamous
relationships is somehow questioned if I don't want to call it marriage.
Now,
how do you recognize her or him when the right one comes along? They
say you will “just know.” But, I don’t know about that either. I’ve
been totally convinced more than once that I “just knew” she had
arrived only to find out how deeply into "ir-reality" I could be.
In
the final assessment, I don't believe finding connection is about
running around trying to find Mr. or Ms. Right . . . looking for her or
him in 'all the wrong places' with no context other than a
cocktail. And, no, I cannot say I never tried.
It’s about
just letting things be, and knowing they are as they are suppose to be.
It's about enjoying being with yourself and all the things you love to
do and be and the good friends who share triumphs, joys and sadness
when they come. It's about participating in community and thereby
attaining context and hope of an actual relationship that dares to be
healthy. It's about recognizing that a good friendship just might be
most valuable relationship of all.
Have I made mistakes? Some I
cannot change and always will regret. Have I learned anything along the
way? One would only hope, yet what I do with that knowledge remains to
be seen.
These are my thoughts and secrets of being . . . of
being Okay-To-Be-Ha on Valentines Day and on every day, no matter what
the calendar says.
(Pompidou Center Photo) Added by BettyS @ 5:00 PM
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Past Entries
- Miss Callie Louise Has a Great Granddaughter
3/5/2011 - Of Security, Preparedness & Wingwomen I Love
4/3/2010 - How I Understand My Work . . .
3/10/2010 - Ladies Night - 1st Thurdays
2/5/2010 - Welcoming the New Year, the New Decade
12/31/2009 - At Least on Some Days, It Is Good To Be from Mississippi
11/21/2009 - Pumpkins Are at the Safeway . ..
9/23/2009 - Of Culkin Wildcats . . .
8/29/2009 - Barefootin'
4/1/2009 - January's Come In with a Bang Thus Far . . .
1/27/2009 - Ladies Night @ Orson
1/10/2009 - Olde Year Out, Adieu! Adieu! – Welcome Now The New! The New!
12/31/2008 - Gratitude & Wishes At Christmas Eve & Hanukkah
12/24/2008 - Dissenting Voices on Election Day
11/3/2008 - Halloween Revisited
10/31/2008 - Single Again on Valentine's Day
2/14/2008 - The Cat Peed on the Keyboard . . .
1/2/2008 - Saying Goodbye . . . Legacy of 2007
12/31/2007 - A Toast to Reno and the 45th Annual "Fun Train" . . . Or
12/26/2007 - How I Spent Thanksgiving II
12/9/2007 - How I Spent Thanksgiving
12/8/2007 - Unbelievable . . . And So It Goes
11/12/2007 - Ladies Night at MECCA Is Back!
11/2/2007 - My Old Cat, Miss Frances Calico
10/16/2007 - Out from Mississippi . . . Presented at the Memorial for Trevor Hailey
10/6/2007 - Why Do I Love the Pumpkins?
10/1/2007 - Now There Is a Lava Lamp Over My Head
9/16/2007 - May the Goddess Bless Mrs. Audrey Kinzer
9/13/2007 - Should I Not Support Hillary Clinton . . .
8/11/2007 - Live Earth Concerts
7/8/2007 - Showing My True Colors . . .
7/2/2007 - Lamentations Sometimes . . .
6/9/2007 - Mongolian Vodka, May & Masturbation Month
5/12/2007 - Of Birthdays, Birthdays and More Birthdays!
4/29/2007 - When Unexpected Friendship Comes . . .
4/15/2007 - Megablogging on the Day of Hunky Jesus
4/8/2007 - There Is No Map for Where We Go . . .
3/25/2007 - Time To Be Irish, Again
3/12/2007 - How I Got My Sore Ribcage
3/1/2007 - How I Told My Brother That I'd Be Working with Team GV
2/24/2007 - Natalie Says She's Ready to Make Nice
2/16/2007 - Kitty Rose on My Mind
2/11/2007 - Betty Says: GO BEARS!!!
2/4/2007 - Molly Ivins, Texas & "The Dildo Diaries"
2/3/2007 - Don't Know Much About . . . Horses
1/29/2007 - Seek Joy! Joy in the Morning! Joy at Night!
1/28/2007 - Don't Often Write About Celebrities
1/19/2007 - Words to Remember When Working with Gay Men
1/16/2007 - Abundance in the Window
1/13/2007 - Is Betty a Lesbian?
1/9/2007 - So Many Women, So Little Time
1/6/2007 - Starting the Year Off with A Rant
1/4/2007 - Mississippi & Castro Memories on the Night Before
12/24/2006 - Christmas Memories from Round About Culkin
12/19/2006 - 'Tis the Season, Isn't It?
12/15/2006 - She Sang at Least Six Verses to Us
12/7/2006 - "I.M.P.E.A.C.H." Bush!" Signs Outside the SaveMart Arena
11/23/2006 - Maybe I Do Act Like a Teenager About Them
11/12/2006 - Yes, It's True That I Like to Write
11/10/2006 - Juneau What I Mean About Losing Stuff?
11/5/2006 - When Disappointment Becomes Disbelief and Then Some
11/1/2006 - It's Almost Halloween Again . . .
10/25/2006 - Miss Louise Might Be Turning Over in Her Grave
10/13/2006 - Peaks So High, They Touch the Hands of . . . the Goddess
9/24/2006 - Seeking Another Filthy / Gorgeous Ghetto Princess
9/4/2006 - Upon My Return from Brokeback Mountain
9/2/2006 - Sometimes I Am Easily Amused
8/27/2006 - And So It Goes . . . There Go the Pickles
8/25/2006 - Neither Storm of Night, nor Terrorists, nor Cancellations . . .
8/20/2006 - You'll Never Bike Alone
8/15/2006 - When Love Manifests Itself in Friendship . . .
8/5/2006 - January - June, 2006
7/12/2006 - St. Patrick's Day - 2006
3/17/2006 - Single Again on Valentine's Day
2/14/2006 - 2006 Archive
1/1/2006 - 2005 Entries
12/31/2005
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